Serving Lonely Teenagers

Enduring the COVID pandemic in Cuba has involved an extraordinary effort, especially where it comes to relationships. Since March 2020, confinement in most regions of the country has been extensive. The churches have remained closed since the first wave of infections; and after some unsuccessful attempts, the State has not been able to adequately restart the school year. This means adolescents have been isolated from the common spaces they shared with their friends and have had to learn how to spend so many hours of the day with adults at home. Internet prices in our country are exorbitant and almost all social interaction is via text messaging - very little video calling. So, in the midst of a pandemic, with new challenges of coexistence in their homes, and isolated from their relationships, teens feel more alone than ever. 

How can we offer effective comfort through the message of the Gospel to adolescents who suffer from loneliness, especially in the midst of the pandemic? To minister to our kids, the story of Jesus' passion offers an incomparable resource that makes the gospel message closer and more relevant, providing comfort for those who have felt - or still feel - alone.

Solitude from Gethsemane to Golgotha

Jesus lives his last hours - from Gethsemane to Golgotha ​​- in a downward spiral of loneliness towards the cruelest death. Luke recounts the events in a masterful way, describing Jesus as the true Suffering Servant of Isaiah on this mortal journey. A fundamental part of this description is the interaction with the other characters, who contrast with the attitude and identity of Jesus as the Lamb of God, highlighting his own loneliness.

Gethsemane is the place where the true Adam reverses the failure of the first humans; turning it into the prelude to victory that would open, for redeemed humanity, the doors of a new relationship with God. But here, the distance between Jesus and his disciples was more than a stone's throw. Their response to the invitation to pray not to enter into temptation was sleeping. Jesus, though accompanied by his most intimate followers in the garden, was alone.

During the arrest and trials that precede Golgotha, dissimilar characters interact, from their own agendas, with the identity of Jesus as the King of God: disciples, religious and governmental authorities, soldiers, and the crowd. For the rulers it was a mere political pawn. For the religious authorities, a hindrance to their selfish and myopic interests. Even the disciples, through betrayal, violence, flight, and total denial, demonstrate the misunderstanding of the character of the Kingdom of Christ. Jesus was surrounded by many, but misunderstood by all. In the midst of this crowd of people, Jesus is alone.

Jesus' words to the women of Jerusalem on the way to his crucifixion describe his loneliness. He is the green tree (see Luke 23:31), the offspring of Jesse that suffers the iniquity of his own, the dry tree that will suffer the wrath to come. Even in a narrative full of characters who appear accompanying him in his suffering, the Lamb of God goes to death in loneliness, because only he can bear such suffering upon himself, in total perfection. How does this story offer comfort to our young people? The passion of Jesus is, at the same time, solidary and substitutive.

Jesus Knows Your Loneliness

The beginning of the path to the comfort of loneliness is assurance that Jesus knows, first hand, what it means to be alone. God is close to the darkest experiences of the human being. He is a God in solidarity with the pain of his own. Like Jesus in the garden, teenagers will feel alone in the company of people who do not show the empathy that their situation demands. 

Life in Cuba is an epic survival exercise, which tends to make adults disdain the problems that worry and stress kids. They will feel lonely if our response to their pain is: “that's nothing. I have X bigger concerns…”. The loneliness of our teenagers is real. Gethsemane is a call to the families of the young, and to adults in the faith community to be empathetic to age-specific situations. We are called to live an incarnational ministry in the midst of the younger generation listening and being sensitive to their crises and loneliness. Pastors and leaders must go beyond supplying our massive face-to-face services with encounters on social networks; we must look for creative ways to accompany students in their isolation.

The Loneliness of Jesus and Our Ability to Abandon Others

The common reaction to loneliness and abandonment is self-pity: they consider those who abandon them as sinful villains and themselves the victim incapable of doing such a betrayal. All this really does is to hinder forgiveness. The loneliness of our teenagers is real, but we must help them see it in a balanced, gospel-like way. An adequate reading of the Passion will make them understand what we have in common with the people around Jesus: a tendency to abandon others in their loneliness. On this side of Eden, selfishness has made a nest in our hearts. The crowing of the rooster in the priest's courtyard is intended for those who assume, like Peter, that they would never do such a thing. Such a radical understanding of loneliness is important for two reasons: it assures teens who are lonely that Jesus understands their isolation, and helps them forgive and reestablish relationships when others have abandoned them.

The Loneliness of Jesus is Redemptive

The Son of God, carrying on his shoulders the immense hell-sized solitude, allows us to encourage teenagers with hope that the day will come when all sad things - including loneliness - will become untrue. God will wipe away every tear from our eyes and His presence - the most beautiful in the whole universe - will welcome us in a joyful embrace of eternity. The preaching of Jesus’ Passion for our adolescents in solitude reminds us of  the eschatological realization of the Kingdom of God. As this final moment arrives, the community of imperfect saints, gathered by faith in the crucified, embraces adolescents in an incarnational ministry that welcomes the suffering and anticipates the heavenly embrace of the Lamb with his Bride. Our duty is not to anesthetize students’ pain with vain and fleeting entertainment:

The loneliness of Jesus in the hours before the cross is both empathetic and substitutionary. There is no situation in our lives that he has not experienced. It also prevents us from becoming victimized by pointing out that no human being - including ourselves - is capable of being the perfect company for someone. There is a powerful comfort in the unique experience of total solitude on Calvary.