Pastoral Resources on Gender and Sexuality
Students are questioning their sexuality at ever-increasing rates, and it can be confusing to know how to respond with truth and love. Truth without love might “hold the line” or “just teach the Bible,” but will not display the patient love of Christ for those who are struggling. Love without truth might protect your church and ministry from getting “cancelled,” and it might make the student feel cared for and safe… but it will empower them to compromise on God’s design for human sexuality.
When you try to ministry to students with both truth and love, it’s easy to be second-guessed by people on either side of the truth-love spectrum. The following resources will help you think biblically about God’s design for human sexuality and about the biological, psychological, and sociological factors that come into play.
One of the chief elements this list prioritizes in books and resources is the role of the gospel in sexual holiness, rather than highlight resources that promote a type of Christian self-help.
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On Christian Sexuality
Good God, Gay Girl: The Story of Who I Was, and Who God Has Always Been, by Jackie Hill Perry
Through this honest and vulnerable testimony, Perry casts light on the goodness of God for sexual sinners. Students will actually read this book: it’s raw, compelling, beautifully-written, and it drips the grace of Christ on every page.
Born Again This Way, by Rachel Gilson
Rachel Gilson describes her own unexpected journey of coming out and coming to faith... and what came next. As she does so, she addresses many of the questions that Christians living with same-sex attraction are wrestling with: Am I consigned to a life of loneliness? How do I navigate my friendships? Will my desires ever change? Is there some greater purpose to all this?
Love Thy Body: Answering Hard Questions About Life and Sexuality, by Nancy Pearcey
In her typical way, Pearcey provides insightful and practical reflection on gender and sexuality. This is a fantastic resource for youth workers and parents to read, and even to read/discuss with teenagers who want to dig into a biblical worldview.
Holy Sexuality and the Gospel: Sex, Desire, and Relationships Shaped by God's Grand Story, by Christopher Yuan
Yuan shares from his own story about coming out of the homosexual lifestyle and into Christian joy. He makes a compelling (and biblical!) case that the goal in ministry to the LGBTQ community isn’t to “make them straight,” but for them to grow in holiness before the cross of Christ.
Living in a Gray World: A Christian Teen’s Guide to Understanding Homosexuality, by Preston Sprinkle
Sprinkle can be somewhat controversial, but he does an excellent job keeping the gospel at the heart of his approach to ministry to the LGBTQ+ community while maintaining convictions about biblical sexuality. There is much for youth pastors to learn from the way he writes to students in this book. You would want to read this book before you give it to students to make sure you’re willing to stand by what it says (that’s a good rule of thumb anyway!).
What Does the Bible Teach About Homosexuality? by Kevin DeYoung
This book presents a helpful summary of the biblical teachings on homosexuality. Keeping a few copies of this in the office will prove helpful in discussing sexuality with students and parents.
Harvest USA booklets
These booklets are so helpful because they’re so short and focus on one particular topic. If you stock an assortment of these in your youth room in a place where students can take one without everyone noticing, they’ll disappear rather quickly. A supply of these booklets will also prove to be an asset to your counseling ministry with parents and students.
On Pornography
Finally Free: Fighting for Purity with the Power of Grace, by Heath Lambert
Easily the best book on battling porn out there, this book is a goldmine for helping strugglers apply the gospel to their battle against porn. You can read through this book with an older teen or college student, but reading it multiple times on your own will reshape your personal conversations with students around this challenging and shame-inducing topic.
The Death of Porn: Men of Integrity Building a World of Nobility, by Ray Ortlund
Confession: This book is new, so I haven’t read it yet. But anything by Ray Ortlund is trustworthy and saturated in the gospel.
Love Thy Body: Answering Hard Questions about Life and Sexuality, by Nancy Pearcey
An insightful and theological look at what it means to be embodied, sexual people. Human sexuality is grounded in what it means for us to be created in the image of God. This is likely too heady for students, but will be an invaluable resource for your own development and thought.
On Transgenderism and Gender Dysphoria
What God Has to Say About Our Bodies: How the Gospel is Good News for Our Physical Selves, by Sam Allberry
This is a deeply biblical book that explores what the Bible teaches about our bodies. Both robust and biblical, this book is a must-reed for youth workers. Read our book review on it.
Embodied: Transgender Identities, the Church, and What the Bible Has to Say, by Preston Sprinkle
Nuanced and biblical, but not to the point where it becomes unclear regarding biblical faithfulness. Again, Sprinkle’s genuine compassion for those who struggle with gender dysphoria can make some traditionalists uncomfortable, but it doesn’t need to (no more than Jesus’ compassion for adulteresses and prostitutes).
TransFormed: A brief biblical and pastoral introduction to understanding transgender in a changing culture, by The Evangelical Alliance (UK)
This free PDF is one of the most helpful resources out there. It’s concise, well organized, and presents guidance on all the big quesitons you’ll likely ask. Obviously, it’s “only” a PDF, so don’t expect thorough exegetical work here, but it’s a great handout to work through with your volunteer team.
Helpful NonReligious Books
When Harry Became Sally: Responding to the Transgender Movement, by Ryan T. Anderson (no longer available through Amazon)
Anderson highlights insights from biology, psychology, and philosophy in order to help readers evaluate the transgender movement. This book has become so controversial it has been banned from Amazon.
Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Crazy Seducing our Daughters, by Abigail Shrier
As a nonChristian, Shrier is not arguing that transgenderism or gender dysphoria should be resisted, but is raising a warning about the sociological phenomenon facing teenagers today. This is especially important when talking with students and parents about the dangers of introducing hormone blockers and gender reassignment surgeries.
Helpful Curriculum & Online Resources
Christian Sexuality series
This 12 week video curriculum might be the best resource out there for youth groups who want to have honest and risky conversations about biblical sexuality.
Sexual Integrity Initiative
This partnership between CPYU and Project Six19 is one of the best online resources for youth workers and parents who are concerned about their teens’ sexual development. Their articles and resources will help you resist the common temptations of over-or-under-reacting.
Helpful Videos and Podcasts
The Local Youth Pastor (by Reformed Youth Ministries)
Their current season features a series of conversations on the topic of biblical sexuality.
Youth Culture Matters, by the Center for Parent/Youth Understanding
Walt Mueller and Jason Soucineck apply the gospel to a host of issues facing today’s teenagers, many of which focus on sexuality. Scrolling through their feed will provide many helpful interviews. The shownotes on the CPYU website are littered with additional resources.
Theology in the Raw, by Preston Sprinkle
When it comes to engaging the LGBTQ+ community with the gospel, I can’t think of anyone better to learn from than Preston Sprinkle. His podcast frequently hosts friends who are part of the LGBTQ+ community in some form, and with whom he sometimes respectfully disagrees with, but whose stories and voices are important and valuable.
